Ladies and gentlemen, behold: The Mighty O herself, Oprah Winfrey! Yes, THE Oprah - pioneering journalist, barrier breaker, stereotype shatterer! The benevolent legend who brought the world The Angel Network, Oprah's Book Club, a South African Leadership Academy, and Dr. Phil (okay, even legends slip up every now and then). Oprah! SHE of persevering determination, nurturing strength, and entrepreneurial savvy. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, such a living icon exists in our modern world, and that earthly angel is none other than Ms. O.
So explain to me, will you, why, while innocently checking the headlines this morning, I was assaulted by Winfrey's name in the following contexts: "Oprah Packs On the Pounds...And the Guilt" (E! Online), "Oprah Winfrey Says She Weighs 200 Pounds" (The Associated Press), "Oprah's Battle of the Bulge" (Knoxville News Sentinel, TN), "Oprah Winfrey 'Embarrassed' to Weigh 200 Pounds" (Seattle Post Intelligencer), "Oprah Essay on 'Dissapointing' Weight Gain to Appear in O Magazine" (ABC News). Oh no wait, one more: "Oprah Calls Herself 'A Fat Cow'" (KOLD-TV, AZ). No, hold on, this one's pretty good too: "How Tall is Oprah? And Why Oprah Weighing 200 Pounds Matters" (Associated Content, CO).
So we're serious then? Really? This is headline news now? This is the same woman that Time Magazine has repeatedly honored as one of the 100 Most Influential People in the World? The same industrious businesswoman listed as the only black billionaire on the Forbes list? The same humanitarian who's donated millions of dollars and hours of airtime to aiding impoverished people throughout the world? Yeah, that's her. But let's be honest - what good is an endless list of unprecedented accomplishments when you can't fit into sample sizes? Clearly, our society knows how to uphold strong morals and reward hard work and fortitude - ugh, unless you can't rock skinny jeans and a strappy tank - then, yuck!
An avid fan, supporter, and defender of Lady O, it pains me to pin a good chunk (stop it, that wasn't a pun) of the blame on her. What the hell is this awesomely powerful woman doing, publicly berating herself for gaining weight?! I've worked in and obsessed over magazines long enough to understand what sells (weight, sex, drugs, weight, death, weight, and The Jonas Brothers), but parading her present self next to a slimmer, trimmer 2005 version of her body on the January cover of O, with the sickeningly blunt headling, "How Did I Let This Happen Again?" is insulting. Not just to herself, but to any man, woman, or child who's ever been the least bit inspired by her. How are any of the billions (maybe trillions? What's the world's population again?) of Oprah devotees supposed to take pride in their idol, or themselves, when this insanely successful mogul unabashedly proclaims, that standing next to fellow superstars, Tina Turner and Cher, "I felt like a fat cow. I wanted to disappear." Oh, fantastic. The next time I get promoted, sell a story, or receive any inkling of praise, I'll be sure to follow in my role model's footsteps and immediately seek out the first Lulu Lemon-clad, carb-denouncing waif to make me feel bad about myself. Sounds like a plan!
And trust me, I'm not one to ring the sexism alarm when this sort of media scrutiny goes down, but I'm at least going to raise the chauvinistic terror threat to a level orange. Not to unnecessarily bring up that Dr. Phil guy again, but do you really think his expanding waist line would ever make international news? I mean, the fact that he's technically not even a DOCTOR doesn't seem to concern anyone (he has a PhD in Psychology, but given a few more years and a couple of hefty government loans to expand my undergrad degree, I could have that too). Why is it perfectly acceptable to reduce one of the media's most compelling female revolutionaries to her BMI while Mr. Pseudo-Doctor is continuously lauded for his convoluted Texan idioms?
Of course, none of this is news, but it was all aggravating enough for me to turn off this week's re-run of 90210 (another stunning example of female empowerment and healthy body image...) to rant about it. And so as to protect myself from the wrath of the omnipotent Mighty O, I retract any and all disparaging remarks made about Ms. Winfrey, Harpo Productions, O Magazine, and/or Gayle King. All slanderous comments regarding Dr. Phil shall remain intact.
4 comments:
who is she kidding - the only reason she's pissed is that people will stop buying her diet cook books, workouts, blah,blah, blah.
And you know her "trainer", "chef", etc... are ticked off because people might not buy their crap either!
No, I'm not cynical, why do you ask??
They air Dr Phil on primetime here in AMS. literally at like 10 pm I see his ugly self righteous mug blazing through my living room. listened to about 15 minutes of his show, and I think I had a similiar reaction to that woman who was allergic to Mary Hart's voice, oh and Kramer.
somewhere... a publicist is crying. or having a party for all the great media coverage. i'm trying to get to the bottom of what this publicity stunt is really for - cant be helping holiday sales of her diet cook books.
good job sister - i think this is one of my favorite posts yet! and that's not just cuz you name checked The Jonas Brothers AND Cher in the same post.
My comment was just lost....here we go round 2. I too am an avid fan and defender of Oprah (peeps like to hate). This magazine is sitting beside my bed right now and I read the article last night. You bring up a very good point. Eff Dr. Phil and keep up the writing!c
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